Phonetics

[akk]

Dear phone company, I'd very much appreciate it, if my phone doesn't ring to tell me that

1. it is busy (I prefer my phone to be busy when I actually tried to call somebody who's already speaking with somebody else!)


2. I'm in somebody's waiting loop (I bother with waiting loops only if I called the service and can afford the wait!)


3. my inbox has no messages (I only want to know about existing messages if I called the damn box!)


4. a telemarketer, speaking apparently an ancient form of Aramaic, wants to sell me something. (No, you can't opt out of the ensuing verbal decapitation.)